The recent opening of Nook Newcastle, a non-clinical mental health safe haven for young people, reflects a growing recognition that families should not have to wait for difficulties to become a crisis before seeking help. Based at The Beacon on Westgate Road, it offers free walk-in, telephone and online support without the need for a GP referral. Its focus on accessibility brings into view a question many parents face: how do you know when a change is part of growing up, and when it may be time to look more closely?
 

What to look for

Parents often notice that something has changed before they are aware of exactly what is wrong. A child may be quieter than usual, more irritable, reluctant to go to school or no longer interested in the people and activities they once enjoyed. When asked, they may say they are fine, yet children and teenagers naturally have difficult days. They fall out with friends, worry about school, retreat to their rooms and experience shifts in mood as they develop greater independence. Rather than focusing on one incident, it can be more useful to notice patterns. Has your child become less interested in friends or activities they usually enjoy? Are they sleeping much more or less than usual? Perhaps they seem persistently irritable, find it harder to concentrate, regularly avoid school or complain of headaches or stomach aches without an obvious cause.

Emotional distress does not always look like visible sadness. A 2025 evidence review commissioned by the Department for Education distinguishes between internalised difficulties, such as anxiety, withdrawal and excessive worry, and more outwardly expressed behaviours, including anger, defiance and disruption. It also notes that quiet or overly compliant children may be overlooked because their difficulties are less visible. None of these changes automatically indicates a mental health condition, and context and duration matter. A few unsettled days following an argument, exam or change at home may resolve with time and reassurance, whereas changes that continue for several weeks, intensify or begin to affect education, relationships and everyday family life may deserve closer attention.
 

Starting a conversation

Starting a conversation does not require perfect wording. A simple observation may feel less confronting than repeated questions: “I’ve noticed you haven’t seemed yourself recently. I’m here if you want to talk.” Some young people speak more freely while walking, travelling in the car or doing something alongside an adult, while others may initially insist that nothing is wrong. That does not mean the conversation has failed. Remaining calm, listening without rushing to solve the problem and leaving the door open may be more helpful than pressing for an immediate explanation.
 

When to seek support

While services like Nook Newcastle provide an important drop-in service for young people looking for a safe haven, parents often have their own concerns that benefit from discussion with a professional, identifying issues they are facing and how to communicate better with their young person. You may also feel your young person would benefit from therapy themselves and wish to discuss this. You don’t need to be certain that they need therapy before speaking to us - uncertainty is exactly why parents arrange an initial consultation.

This consultation offers a confidential space to talk through what has changed, how long it has been happening and what may be affecting your child. It is also an opportunity to ask questions, share concerns and consider whether therapy, another form of support or simply a period of observation may be the most appropriate next step. If therapy appears suitable, your practitioner will explain how the process would work for your child, including confidentiality, parental involvement and what they can expect from sessions. The aim is to help both parents and young people feel informed and comfortable with the support being offered. Seeking support does not mean assuming that something is seriously wrong. Often, it is simply a thoughtful response to a change and a way of giving a young person space to be understood before difficulties become harder to manage.

If you are concerned about a change in your child or teenager, our initial consultation offers a confidential opportunity to discuss what you have noticed and explore what might help.